Pinchy would have wanted it this way

Someone is having fun with the Photoshop app on her phone!

I've always wanted to go to the Lobster Festival in Rockland, Maine. I already have my and my husband's outfits planned. I will obviously wear my blue lobster t-shirt, and probably a stretchy skirt with plenty of space for belly expansion due to buttery crustacean consumption. He will wear his lobster polo shirt, lobster belt, lobster pants, and lobster flip-flops. And, obviously, his lobster hat. I think the only question that remains regarding his outfit will be which pair of lobster boxers to wear. Have I mentioned before that he likes lobster? He wrote a 35 page paper on the lobster industry, and even has an e-mail address mentioning lobsters. So DAMN STRAIGHT I learned to make a tasty lobster roll.

Lobster rolls
Makes about 10 rolls*

7 cooked and cooled lobsters
3/4 cup finely chopped celery - including the leaves! (this is the secret to a good roll)
3 tablespoons mayonnaise
3 tablespoons olive oil
juice of 1 1/2 lemons
salt and pepper, to taste
10 top-split hot dog rolls (lightly toasted if you prefer them that way)

Pick the meat from lobsters and roughly chop it. Stir in the rest of the ingredients until just combined. For best results, cover and refrigerate for a few hours before stuffing into hot dog rolls.

*This is very easy to cut down. If you just want to make this for two people, use one lobster, about 2 tablespoons of celery, and just a tiny squirt of all the remaining ingredients.

Welcome back chicken

I've been neglecting my blog, I know. You may poke me in the eye with dried spaghetti as punishment. But I come bearing barbecue sauce - MADE WITH BOURBON - as a "please forgive me" gesture. I know this photo is terrible. It's from a video I took while camping at Assateague National Seashore, and it was getting dark outside. If you live anywhere near Assateague, and you've never been - it's so worth it. There are wild horses on the island, and you basically camp right on the beach. A few years ago (the first time I was there) the wild horses wandered into our campsite and tried to eat the corn we were grilling. It was a little awkward - I mean, didn't their horse moms teach them that food on the grill would be WAY too hot to eat right away? Plus I didn't even get a chance to spread it with a chive butter yet. Patience, my little horsie friends, patience! No horses wandered into our camp this year, possibly because the whole thing was ringed with poison ivy. There was so much it was almost comical. At least the horse moms taught their foals something.

Back to the sauce - I slathered it on some chicken thighs (bone in, skin off) and DAMN, was it good. So much so that I risked a horrible photo to share it with you. God - it's awful. It looks like something the National Enquirer would publish - "Look, there's a Sasquatch off in the woods making out with Nikki Haley!"

Bourbon bbq sauce (adapted from a July 2004 Bon Appetit recipe)
(makes enough sauce for 3-4 people)

2 tablespoons butter
1/2 cup finely minced onion
1/2 cup ketchup (Heinz is the only brand of ketchup one should ever use)
2 tablespoons molasses
1 tablespoon brown sugar (well packed)
1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce
1 teaspoon yellow mustard
1/4 teaspoon chili powder
2 tablespoons bourbon
6 chicken thighs or 12 chicken legs

Melt the butter over medium low heat in a small saucepan. Add the onions, and stir constantly until they are softened, about 5 minutes. Stir in all the rest of the ingredients except the bourbon and let it come to a simmer, stirring often to keep it from burning. Let it bubble for about 10 minutes. Add the bourbon and cook for another minute or two. 

Keep sauce refrigerated until ready to use. Grill chicken thighs or legs until done on one side, then turn, and slather with sauce. Dredge the other side with sauce once you've taken them off the grill. 

Rampage: Part Pickle (with Baked Bean Bonus)

I tend to be a little scared of pickled foods that were not formerly cucumbers. Interesting tidbit: in the grocery store I shopped at in Glasgow, they had a whole wall of pickled items, which was across from the entire wall of baked beans - there were like a BAJILLION varieties of baked beans - it would blow your mind. One time, this (American) girl I knew in Scotland won a push-up contest at a bar, and she won her weight in baked beans. That is how seriously the Scots take their baked beans.

But - back to pickles.

So, at the grocery store, I once asked where the pickles were. The sales associate was confused - "Pickled what?" Because they pickle everything there. In fact, in the winter, people there drink so much they become pickled.

But as I've come to love my Shelburne Farms cookbook as much as a brotha from anotha motha, after seeing this ramp pickle recipe I really wanted to try my hand at non-cucumber pickles. And now I've made it three times in two years. It's super easy, and makes the ramp season last just a little bit longer. They are a little spicy, a little onion-y, and tangy and delicious. Eat them with anything you'd eat a regular pickle with - on the side of a sandwich for lunch, on top of a burger, as an interesting accoutrement to a cheese plate, etc.

Ramp Pickles, from Cooking with Shelburne Farms

20 or so ramps, trimmed so there is just about 1 inch of greens
1 cup cider vinegar
1/4 cup honey
1/4 cup sugar
1 teaspoon hot pepper flakes (I used aleppo pepper flakes)
1 teaspoon whole black peppercorns
1 teaspoon whole fennel seeds
1 teaspoon whole coriander seeds
1 bay leaf

Blanch the ramps in boiling water for two minutes. Immediately transfer to an ice water bath to stop the cooking.

In a small saucepot, heat the vinegar, honey, sugar, hot pepper, peppercorns, fennel, coriander, and bay leaf to a simmer.

Put the ramps in a clean jar big enough to hold all the liquid (and the ramps). So - back to the recipe - pour the hot liquid over the ramps. Only once it cools down (this will take a few hours) do you want to cover it with the lid, then pop it in the fridge for at least 12 hours before eating. The recipe says they'll last a month in the fridge.

 Bonus photo: the wall of baked beans at a Scottish grocery store

Rampage: Part Trout

As mentioned in a previous post, its ramp season! Well, it's almost done now. I've been meaning to post this for a couple of days, but you know, all that other life-living kept getting in the way. I happened to buy these trouts (purposely adding the "s" because I want to) at a Whole Foods in Virginia, where I questioned the clerk as to why there was tax on my purchase. "It's just trouts!" I protested to the confused clerk, thinking my purchase was mislabeled as take-out food or something. So, boo to Virginia for taxing groceries. (Side note: yes, even super-liberal Democrats will occasionally complain about taxes.) Apparently, my trusty Shelburne Farms cookbook agrees with me. It suggested that, in the ideal situation, one would catch the trouts in a gently babbling brook, then forage for the ramps on the side of the stream. And, when you get home, Aunt Bea will have made a pie! Golly!

Trouts with ramps, served with herbed aioli, adapted from Cooking with Shelburne Farms
Serves 2

2 whole trouts, cleaned and butterflied
8 ramps (or scallions, if you can't find ramps), hairy root bits trimmed off
salt and pepper
2 sprigs each of 2-3 herbs (I used garlic chives, regular chives, and oregano)
salt and pepper

Herbed aioli (because I refuse to call it mayonnaise)
1 egg yolk (farm fresh, please)
3/4 teaspoon mustard
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon lemon juice
1 teaspoon white wine vinegar
1 minced teaspoon of each of the herbs you used above
1/4 cup olive oil



Put your cast-iron skillet in the oven and set it to broil. Let it get hot in there while you get the fish ready.

Rinse and pat dry the trouts. Open each fish like a book, and season the inside with salt and pepper. Divide the herb sprigs and all but two of the ramps among the fish. (Save the two ramps with the longest greens.) Close up the fish, then tie each one closed with a ramp. The photo above is of the raw trouts, so you can see the little ramp knot. Don't they look like they just ate a bunch of ramps? Ha!

Carefully take the superhot skillet out of the oven and put the trouts in. Broil them for 7-9 minutes, or until the fish is cooked through.

Meanwhile, make the aioli. In a mini-chopper (or blender), zip up the egg yolk, mustard, salt, lemon juice, vinegar and herbs. Add the olive oil, and zip again until nicely emulsified. (It can probably take more oil than that, but I liked it like this.)

When the fish is done, serve it whole on the plate. The exposed ramps might be a little charred, but that's ok - I won't make you eat that part. To eat, scrape off the skin (it is really easy), and serve with the aioli.

The inaugural mango post

My food twin (he who has the same likes and dislikes) is my brother-in-law Drew.  We are both former Indian food-haters.  It's like our taste buds graduated, and are now taking advance courses in curry. I think you're going to like this one, Drew! It comes from Eating Well, and as Indian food goes, it was pretty easy to put together. I say that because my husband and I make a fair amount of Indian food, but I don't blog about it because the recipes and spice blends can be intricate, and all the typing and explaining that would go into a post is exhausting just to think about. If you are looking for a really good Indian cookbook, I highly recommend 660 Curries. Despite the many steps, the author is crystal clear about you need to do to achieve a spice nirvana.

Mango Dal, adapted from Eating Well, February 2010
Serves 4

1 cup yellow split peas
4 cups water
1/2 teaspoon turmeric

1 tablespoon vegetable oil
1/2 teaspoon cumin seeds
1/2 teaspoon coriander seeds
1 onion, chopped
4 cloves of garlic, minced
1 tablespoon minced ginger
1/4 teaspoon cayenne
12 oz. bag frozen mango chunks OR two mangoes, peeled and chopped
cilantro, for garnish
brown or white rice, for serving

Put the split peas in a colander and rinse until the water runs clear, then put them in a saucepan with the water and turmeric. Add a pinch of salt. Bring to a boil, then reduce the heat until it is just simmering, partially cover, and cook for about 20 minutes.

Meanwhile, head the oil in a large skillet over medium heat. Cook the cumin and coriander seeds for about 30 seconds, then add the onion and cook until it starts to brown a little, about five minutes. Toss in the garlic, ginger, cayenne, and season with salt (about 1/2 teaspoon), cooking for about a minute. Add the mango and the split peas to the skillet and cook for about 10-15 minutes, stirring occasionally, or until the split-peas are tender. Serve over rice, and top with cilantro.